A Feudal FairyWizard
by 00Slightly00
Summary: [No longer updated] The Inuyasha gang travels to the future via magical well. Of course, where do all magical things lead? Why, Hogwarts, of course! Harry Potter meets Inuyasha in a flurry of broomsticks, kimonos, frogs, twotailed cats, pointy hats and ra
1. Hogwarts and Shippou's and Brooms, Oh My

Inuyasha meets Harry Potter?

Yes, folks... It's the beginning of a beautiful enemyship for Inuyasha and Harry. Have fun!

Disclaimer: STUPID! I don't own Inu characters OR Harry characters! And all that whatnot! That's why it's a FAN fic.

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Inuyasha walked peacefully through the forest towards the well. Er... MOSTLY peacefully.

"Why not?"

"Stupid! SIT!"

...Clunk. Kagome, of course, got to the well first, grumbling things that sounded like, 'can't believe him' and 'stupid jerk' and 'idiot.' Inuyasha crawled out into the clearing, twitching violently, and dragging Shippou, who was sitting on his head, and Miroku, who was trying to hold him down. Inuyasha was clawing at his head angrily while Miroku struggled to hold him down.

"Come _on,_" Kagome said, exasperated, as Shippou narrowly missed getting gutted. Inuyasha stood up just as Sango latched onto his other arm, trying to restrain him. "Inuyashaaaa! I'm going to be late for Mom's birthday! Stop trying to kill Shippou and GET OVER HERE! You _said_ you wanted to come..."

"Keh! It's not like I promised or anything-"

"SIT!"

Inuyasha face planted, dragging Shippou, Miroku, and Sango down with him. Kirara, sitting on the well, mewed boredly and jumped into it. Sango yelped and followed her in, calling her back. Miroku leaped in after both of them.

"Inuyaaashaaaaaa!" Kagome grabbed his arm and dragged him into the well with her, before she realized everybody else was already there.

Everybody floated in awe of the time-travel water. Miroku started drifting in another direction, and of course everybody else followed. Kagome pushed towards them.

"Stop! You're going too far-"

Somewhere unplottable, Hogwarts rested much more peacefully than Inuyasha. Harry Potter, getting dragged roughly past the newly installed well by Snape, was racing to keep up with the teacher's quick pace while hanging onto his broomstick.

"Hurry _up,"_ Snape commanded dryly. At that moment, the well suddenly started spouting beautiful rainbow colours. Snape let go and stared at it in horror. _Rainbow_ colours? "Stay here," he told Harry angrily, and went running off to find Headmaster Dumbledore. Harry didn't actually feel like leaving. He stuck his head into the well in surprise. The colours faded and, to his surprise, he heard voices below.

"Stop! You're going too far-"

"We're here," said a nasally male voice.

"What? This can't be right. This isn't my well," said the first voice.

"Mew," something else said, obviously a cat.

"Why is it so dark? Sango, is that you?" another voice asked. There was what sounded like a sharp clap.

"Mirokuuuu," another female voice snarled savagely.

"Stupid." What sounded like a young kid.

Harry blinked. He'd never seen this sort of magical travel before. Perhaps this was the effect of putting too much Floo powder into well water. He stuck his wand down into the tunnel.

"Lumos."

A bright flash lit up the well and Kagome looked up in surprise to see a boy almost her age, wearing the strangest costume she had ever seen. What a silly pointed hat. It was a far cry from the old fashioned kimonos she was so used to now.

"Erm... Hello?" she asked.

"Hullo, I'm Harry Potter," said Harry Potter cheerfully. "I've never seen people go through wells before."

"Honestly, Harry, I thought you were with Snape-"

"Do you mean you escaped? _Brilliant!_ Now tell us what you're looking at!"

Ron and Hermione stuck their heads over the side of the well. Kagome, Inuyasha, Kirara, Sango, Miroku, and Shippou stared back at them in total confusion.

"Sooo," Kagome said finally. "How do you suppose we get back out?"

"That's easy," Harry answered, and promptly threw his broom down the well.

"_Harry!_" Hermione said nervously, twisting her already curly hair. "You really shouldn't-"

"What do we do with this?" Miroku asked, waving the broom around.

"Er... You fly," Ron answered, looking puzzled. There was silence for a moment.

Then, suddenly, everyone in the well burst out laughing.

"That's funny. Like witches," Kagome said, wiping her eyes. Harry blinked. Why were there muggles down the well?

"I'll get us out," Inuyasha said tiredly. "I'm sick of doing it, though..." Kagome and Miroku climbed on his back. Kirara transformed into the huge firecat and blasted upwards, carrying Sango and Shippou, and Inuyasha followed them out.

Harry, Ron, and Hermione fell backwards in shock. Those were most definately not muggles.

"Oops," Inuyasha said, putting down his friends and jumping into the well. He popped out again, carrying Harry's broom. "I forgot your... 'Flying' device." He grinned and started laughing as he handed it back to Harry. "Definately a device from the future, Kagome."

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So... What happens in chapter 2? Maybe if you review, you'll find out. P Here's a sneak peek: somebody we all know is gonna die due to an absent-minded professor yelling, "Avada Kedavra!" So stay tuned, because if you don't, you don't get to see them blow up! And you won't get to see Inuyasha taking flying lessons, either! Or Miroku in a parody of the Frog Prince! Now please review... Because I can guarantee that's not all that happens next.


	2. The Wrongs of First Period

Okay, so what's happened so far? Inuyasha, Kagome, Miroku, Sango, Shippou, and Kirara have gone through the magic well to the future and ended up in Hogwarts' newly installed well for… I dunno, water, perhaps… And Harry, Ron, and Hermione just watched them jump out of the well without the use of brooms. Needless to say, they might be just a BIT upset and/or nervous. Prepare for chapter 2!

Disclaimer: Shoot'n dang, what made ya think that? Of course I don't own these characters!

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Harry Potter, though in shock, suddenly noticed Kagome… And I mean noticed. With a dreamy sigh, he-

Hermione grabbed him by the hair and yanked him backwards again.

"Ahem."

"What? Oh… Sorry."

It was at this moment in time that Snape returned with Dumbledore and gave a heaving jaw-drop gasp.

"What-did-you-do?" he mouthed at Harry in horror, staring at Inuyasha and the others, or rather at the larger form of Kirara, in what appeared to be fear.

"Nothing, professor," Harry mouthed back, watching in satisfaction as Snape began to shoot sparks out of his wand without meaning to.

Dumbledore seemed not to have noticed, and instead walked in a large circle around the new 'guests.' Kagome flinched nervously, wondering if there was something wrong, and why these two adults were clearly not dressed for their age. Bath robes and witch hats? How strange.

"E-excuse me," Kagome whispered. "Could you possibly tell us… Where we are?"

Dumbledore laughed.

"Of course not. This area is unplottable." Kagome blinked. She had never heard such a stupid excuse before. "But I can tell you that this is Hogwarts school for witchcraft and wizardry."

"Er… Ha, ha?" Kagome tried, unsure of how to answer this. Snape made a strange noise like an angry bird.

And so it was that the entire Inuyasha gang joined Hogwarts.

The first day began like any other Hogwarts day. Inuyasha and Kagome went to their first flying class, Miroku and Shippou went to Transfiguration, Sango put her "cat" (much to Kirara's annoyance) in the girls dorm and went to Defence Against the Dark Arts (DADA).

Inuyasha glared accusingly at his broom, as if ordering it to shred to pieces. Kagome stared as well, wondering if she should just go along with the joke. They got their instructions (yell 'up' and grab your broomstick) and began practice.

Inuyasha stuck his hand over the broom.

"…Up?" he tried, attempting to look casual, while a strange group of first-years stared at his kimono. The broom launched itself at his hand with such velocity that he was knocked backwards. Kagome laughed.

"How did you do that?" she asked, having tried the same trick unsuccessfully herself.

"Half-demons," Inuyasha grumbled. "Better than humans at everything."

"Are not," Harry said, flying up behind him on his own broomstick during his free period. Inuyasha blinked. "You can fly?" he gasped.

Meanwhile, Sango sat boredly in her class, watching the teacher wave around his "wand," as he called it. Lockhart strode over and inspected her carefully.

"Just happened to be wandering by," he said, unconvincingly. "Sango blinked in confusion. Who was this man and why was he talking to her? She put on her sweetest face and tried to reason with the man.

"Oh… I'm a new student and… I really don't know anything about this," she said with an embarrassed blush. Lockhart took this totally the wrong way.

"Well, perhaps I could just show you a few tricks?" he offered. "For instance-" He gave his wand a majestic wave. "The Avada Kedavra is…" He never got to tell her what it was, because the end of his wand suddenly blasted a green explosion across the room, killing Neville Longbottom instantaneously.

"He's dead!" Sango screamed, taking Neville's pulse. "You horrible monster!"

"Yes, well, that can sometimes happen," Lockhart answered sheepishy. Sango gave an anguished cry of confusion and general concern.

Miroku perched on the edge of his chair in Transfiguration. Shippou sat next to him, staring hard at Professor McGonogall. She was teaching them about animagi.

"An animagus is a witch or wizard who can transform his or her body into an animal."

"Professor," Miroku asked carefully. "Can you turn others into animals, too?"

"Certainly," she answered dryly, pointing her wand at Miroku, who instantly shrank into a frog which ribitted loudly. The class erupted into hysterical laughter. For a frog, Miroku still looked genuinely upset. Shippou poked him nervously.

"Frog prince!" somebody shouted from across the room, and shoved a little girl with black hair at Miroku the Frog.

"Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!" chanted the class. The frog receded into the back of the chair.

"C'mere, silly," the girl crooned, grabbing Miroku by the froggy legs, and kissed him. There were cheers.

"Oh! Oh!" Shippou shouted. "Like this?" Shippou poofed into a regular Miroku, causing a disturbing silence to fall on the room as everybody tried to figure out what happened.

Outside on the field, Inuyasha and Harry were in a heated argument about who could fly better on a broomstick.

"How can you say you're better if you've never even tried it before?"

"Half-demons are better at everything!"

"But you've never flown-"

"You just said you did it first try!"

"Yes, but I-"

"Cut it out," Kagome yelled furiously, pulling at her hair without noticing.

"Fine- I'll prove it!" Inuyasha yelled finally. "Up!" And he climbed onto his broom and shot into the air.

"Inuyasha!" Kagome called after him in frustration. Inuyasha zoomed and rolled, zigzagging wildly and still rising higher and higher. Finally, Kagome decided she had to do something. "…S-I-T!" she screamed at the top of her voice. Up overhead, Inuyasha's ears twitched as he heard the magic word. Suddenly, he plunged 50 feet, clutching his broom wildly. There were screams down below, the loudest from the teacher-

"They'll sack me for sure, oh, such stupid students-"

Inuyasha crashed to the ground. There was a loud splintering crack.

"Now he's broken something!" the teacher wailed bitterly.

"Shut up, old woman," Inuyasha growled, standing up and brushing off flecks of dust and slivered wood. The broomstick lay shattered at his feet.

"Half-demons," he grumbled, brushing past Harry and not noticing the other boy's satisfied, uncontrollable smirk. "Better at everything."

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Yes, that was more interesting than the last chapter, wasn't it? Just to answer your questions and complaints, my one faithful reviewer Sir Gawain of Camelot, I would _never_ kill Inu. And no Harry and Kagome pairings. In fact, no out-of-series pairings at all, since I'm trying to make what happens when both movies/shows/books/comics collide, not mate random people to send them on dates. Now, here's your scary sneek peek of chapter 3: Miroku just _has_ to ask somebody that gosh darned famous question of his, Sango attempts Transfiguration class, Kagome meets the dead Neville Longbottom, Inuyasha wreaks havoc in DADA, Kirara and Shippou torment first years in Flying class... I hope this sounds like fun so far and that there are people out there enjoying my fan fic! Reviews pleeeeease!


	3. Lockhart's Windy Day

In case you're confused about what happened last chapter, let's see… Inuyasha took flying lessons with Kagome, and got himself in trouble by trying to outdo Harry Potter on a broomstick that resulted in a 50-foot-high Sit. Miroku and Shippou had Transfiguration class together, which resulted in Miroku getting turned into a frog and Shippou turning into Miroku. Sango went to DADA with Professor Lockhart, which resulted in Neville getting killed. So, what happens next? Prepare for chapter 3!

Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN THESE CHARACTERS! You should know that by now.

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Miroku wandered across the school, heading for his next class: Charms. As he walked down the hall, he noticed a group of giggling girls staring at his monk's clothing. He grinned.

"I've already got charm," he said decidedly, walking over to the girls. They were all black-haired, with bright blue eyes.

"Excuse me," he said hopefully. "Would one of you girls consider bearing my child?" It took a moment for this strange question to set in to the girls minds.

"A happiness charm?" a girl asked him, "or have you had too much Felix Felicis in the past week?" Confused, Miroku tried to figure out what they were talking about, but when he looked up from his thoughts they had left.

In their place stood a very angry Sango.

Shippou walked outside onto the field, wondering what on earth 'Flying Class' could be. He hadn't seen Inuyasha all morning. For good measure, he had taken Kirara with him, just to be sure.

"Hold your hands over your broomstick and say 'up,' " the teacher instructed, demonstrating.

"Oh, but I don't need to learn how to fly," Shippou said, confused. The teacher gave him a sharp stare. So did every other student on the field. The mini fox demon decided to give a demonstration.

"Kirara!" The cat leapt forwards and, in a blaze, transformed into a much larger Kirara, to the gasps and screams of other first-years. Shippou climbed on and they flew into the air, making a big circle around the field, and landing where they had started.

"I can also do this," Shippou said, and ballooned into a huge pink head which floated over a bewildered and extremely impressed pile of students.

Sango just made it in time for Transfiguration class, after giving Miroku a quick and painless death. Or rather, snapping her hand across his face, in an extremely practised motion. Professor McGonogall stared beadily at her, as if giving a personal X-ray. Sango blushed and sat down.

"Sorry, Professor..."

"Now, pick up your quills and begin class."

The professor droned on and on about Animagi. Sango tried to follow, scribbling desperately on her parchment. Finally, the lesson ended, but Sango was still confused.

"Professor, can an Animagus turn into _any_thing?" she asked, looking maniacally deranged because of her confusion. "Because my friend Shippou can-"

"Er... Yes, I've met this... Shippou..."

Kagome walked past the hospital wing and noticed there was a boy in there. She walked in and pushed him, not really thinking about what would happen. It was at this moment that she dropped all her books and yelled,

"He's dead!"

Neville, for obvious reasons, did not react. Kagome thought for a moment. Then, very carefully, she pulled out a jewel shard...

Inuyasha sat quietly for once, watching with mild amusement as Professor Lockhart bounced energetically through the class, describing his heroic deeds. It might have been even _more_ fun if there were real dark arts involved. Or even demons, plain and simple. Inuyasha yawned.

"Am I boring you? I can give you all something more interesting, if you like," he said, with a wink. Somehow, this didn't go over well with the class, but Inuyasha put his head in his hands.

"Please," he replied flatly.

"Class?" Lockhart wafted over airily to what looked like a birdcage covered in cloth so you couldn't see the contents. "Meet my friends..."

And he pulled off the sheet to reveal electric blue pixies! He made some sort of fancy flourish that Inuyasha couldn't quite make out, and suddenly there were pixies all over the classroom. Inuyasha shook his head. This was too easy.

"Everybody get to the back of the room," he ordered. Even Lockhart followed his directions, he sounded so sure of himself. Inuyasha expertly drew the Tetsusaiga. A pixie made a flying leap for his head, blowing blue flames out of his mouth. Inuyasha cut the pixie in half. "Wind scar!" he shouted, waving his sword lazily.

Outside on the pitch, Shippou heard a sort of rumble. He turned just in time to see a huge explosion rock the side of Hogwarts castle. It was, most definately, the Wind Scar, and nothing else.

"Stupid," he muttered.

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Chapter 3 is complete! Hahahahaha -maniacle laughter- What fun! I know, I know... You want your stupid sneek peek. Well... Fine. -Pouts- Here it is... You can look forward to Neville, because he can't stay dead for long, and a Kagome-Sango pair in Charms class. Speaking of which, whatever happened to Miroku? And Inuyasha and Shippou team up to create... Some sort of unstoppable demon Quidditch gang thing! And, I feel I should warn you: there are evil characters in the near future... Such as everyone's favorite vampirish Voldemort+Naraku team! So... Reviews! Pretty please! Now! Or I'll unleash the terrors of Voldaku on you!


	4. I Smife Thee, Neville

Yay! It's Chapter 4! We're almost at chapter 5! Oh, I have so much planned for this chapter! Thank you, loyal reviewers, and I have been sure to include my lovely cousin Nao in this one, since she asked so nicely! -Get's poked by Nao who is standing with a knife- Some of you seem to be enjoying it even though you don't know Inuyasha! I must be a good writer... Heheh. Anyways, the story so far... Inuyasha, Kagome, Shippou, Kirara (pronounced Kilala to non-Inu watchers,) Miroku and Sango have all gone through Kagome's time-traveling well and arrived in Hogwarts, because Hogwarts installed... A new well. So there. And they've just finished second period, which involved Inuyasha blowing up Lockhart's classrom, Miroku hitting on innocent girls, Sango having a pleasant chat with Professor McGonogall, Shippou taking flying lessons, and Kagome meeting the previously killed Neville Longbottom! But everybody likes Neville, right?

Disclaimer: I... Oh, what's the use. I don't own them, ok? Stupid... Lawyers... Staring at me...

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Neville twitched and woke up. He appeared to be in the hospital wing. Something smelled terribly like rotting meat, but he figured he would get used to it. In any case, nobody appeared to be there, so he got out of bed and walked to the door, wondering why he was in there in the first place. Perhaps he had been sleepwalking again? He checked his watch. It was lunch time, so he stepped outside into the empty hall, heading outdoors.

He passed a witch with oddly purple hair. She blanched at the rotting smell and turned in time to see Neville turning a corner.

"'Scuse me," she said icily, bothered by his insane hygiene habits. "Have you ever tried _deoderant?_" Neville didn't listen, he merely disappeared out the great front doors. The witch pinched her nose.

Sango was outside sharing a sandwich from Kagome's bag. Kagome sniffed.

"We've got charms together next," Sango said, swallowing the bread and giving a bite of tuna to Kirara.

"Smell that?" Kagome asked, wincing. Sango flinched. "Disgusting," she continued. "What do you think it is?"

"It smells like it's dead," Sango answered, laughing. The purple haired witch stopped next to them.

"It's just Neville," she reported. Sango looked up in confusion.

"Neville... Longbottom?" she asked, getting confused again.

"Yeah, that guy. Why?"

Sango squeaked in horror as she remembered Lockhart accidentally cursing Neville to death.

"B-but..."

Inuyasha and Shippou watched Quidditch practice from the sides. It was fascinating, from their point of view. Inuyasha scanned the field.

"That's the Smife," he said, pointing to a little golden thing whizzing around in the corner.

"It's not called the Smife," Shippou answered. "Harry said it was a... A..."

"A Golden Smife."

"No, he called it something else."

"No, he didn't."

"He called it a Snerk, or a Snite, or something."

"A... A _snerk..._ Keh... Heheh..."

"Stop laughing! He didn't call it a Smife!"

"What's the red thing? It's... The Kwaffie?"

"Aren't those Bloopers?"

"Hey, we're pretty good at this," Inuyasha decided. Shippou tried not to laugh. For somebody who couldn't figure out what a Snite was, perhaps Inuyasha _could_ be pretty good...

"We should start our own team," Shippou said, laughing.

"We could call it..." Inuyasha thought for a moment. "The... Inuyasha Irks."

"Yeah. You irk people."

"Shut up! What would _you_ call it, then?"

"The Shippou Ships!"

"The wha...?"

Miroku, meanwhile, had discovered the nasty side of this Hogwarts place. Namely, the kid named Malfoy, who had just Petrificus Totalused him into oblivion. Or actually just made him freeze in all sorts of crazy positions, which included lifting his leg like a dog and ballet steps. He flinched as the effects wore off again and Malfoy grabbed him.

"Now, Mirku or whatever-your-name-is, you're going to be... Um... How 'bout you bend over and lick my shoes." For an intelligent being, he really didn't seem too bright.

"That's enough!" Miroku shouted, and pulled out a handful of demon-binding dust, which he threw in Malfoy's eyes angrily, hoping to banish the evil demon that was obviously controlling the boy. Malfoy screamed about being blinded and collapsed angrily, clawing at his eyes. Miroku shrugged. That was good enough for him. He bounded out of the empty classroom and headed for the great outdoors.

Already outside was Inuyasha and Shippou, who had finally come up with their team name: The Feudal Fairy Wizards. Even they couldn't actually remember where they got that name- it had been a long conversation. Kagome and Sango ran up the sidelines towards them, along with the purple-haired witch.

"Inuyaaaaaaaashaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!" Kagome shouted at the top of her voice.

"...Hey," he answered meekly, and she sat down.

"So?"

"Keh... What's wrong? You look..."

"Mildly disturbed," Sango said, quickly giving the story of Neville's magical revival.

"Probably the teachers," Inuyasha answered.

"I wouldn't put it past them," the witch said.

"Who's this?" Inuyasha demanded rudely, without even pausing to look away from Quidditch practice. Kagome sighed.

"This is Nao," she answered tiredly. She was sick of his obnoxious attitude. In fact, why not take out some of the morning's frustration... "Sit, boy."

Harry didn't look up from his game- he thought he imagined the angry shouting and the crashing noises coming from the sidelines.

Voldemort sat in his own dark spot, watching Nagini circle the strange man before him.

"A demon, you say," he mused.

"More than a demon," the man replied, rubbing his white pelt between his fingers.

"Have you ever heard of the boy, Harry Potter?" Voldemort asked him.

"Have you ever heard of the boy, Inuyasha?" Naraku replied. Neither one of them answered.

"I propose a trade," Voldemort said with a smile. "We should take a break from our regular targets..."

"Or we may get bored," Naraku finished, but he had a very insincere glint in his eyes, hidden by the glowing fire that reflected in the crimson drops of his irises.

"You must promise to kill him," Voldemort said in a commanding voice, and held out his hand. "So let us make the Unbreakable Vow..."

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Oh, scary... The powers of Voldaku shall be unleashed upon the powers of Harrinu! Or Harry Yasha! Or Inu Harry? Whatever. Nao got her wish, and I know you're all waiting for my sneak peek... In our next episode of Dragonball Z A Feudal Fairy Wizard, Sango and Kagome make with the happy in Charms class, Inuyasha and Shippou make with the love potions in Potions Class (...Hellooooo Snape!), Miroku goes solo in flying class (I can't get enough of that flying class...), and Kirara finds something unusual about Nao. (Muhahahahahahaaaa!) Also... Shocking guest appearance by Loonie Luna! And that's all, folks!


	5. Love Conquers All, Potions Conquer More

Oh yeah! Chapter 5, folks! We've made it to third period! Cheers! If you'll remember, all the Inuyasha characters are now at Hogwarts through an unfortunate accident with the well, and they've just finished their lunch. Neville is up and walking again, for an "unexplainable" reason, and we've got a new character: Nao, the purple-haired witch cousin! Miroku narrowly escaped Malfoy's torment and Inuyasha has been sitted properly. (I'm sorry! I just... Like making him sit!) Meanwhile, Naraku and Voldemort have made the Unbreakable Vow, deciding Voldemort should go after Inuyasha and Naraku should go after Harry Potter. The terrors of Snake-Monkey Voldaku! Mwah!

Disclaimer: -Sighs- Do I really have to say it? I-DO-NOT-OWN-THESE-CHARACTERS. Unless you're giving them to me. -Glomps Shippou-

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Snape watched his new students closely.There was something about him that he didn't like. It wasn't _just_ the pointy claws or the dog ears... It was the fact that they were both remarkably untalented. Sure, the kid could erupt into flames, and the... Dog could lift a cauldron over his head, but... What use was _that?_

Making a love potion was harder than it looked. Inuyasha stirred worriedly. What if something went horribly wrong and he turned Kagome into a frog? Because, for certain, Kagome would get a good taste of this potion, whether she liked it or not.

"...Hand me the chopped roots," he said with a determined expression.

Kagome and Sango stood across from eachother, holding their newly ordered wand.

"Feel the power of my Holly and Unicorn," Sango laughed.

"Feel the wrath of my Oak and... Dragon heartstring," Kagome answered, sticking her tongue out. How disgusting. Demon heartstrings weren't one of her top favorite things in the world. The two practised happy spells on eachother over and over. Finally, both of them collapsed in a fit of giggles.

"Girls, _please!_" the instructor shouted. Sango, who was happy about everything at the moment, was still glad Kirara wasn't here to watch her. That would be embarrasing... No! It would be happy! Happy!

Kirara was exploring the castle, creeping around one of the towers. She looked up. There was a trapdoor in the ceiling, but how to get up there without attracting attention? She couldn't transform in _here._

"Hello, kitty," said a girl with enormous glasses, carrying a magazine which read "The Quibbler" in big pink letters. Kirara mewed.

"Luna?" asked a misty voice from the ceiling. The trapdoor dropped open with a loud creak and a rope ladder rolled out. Kirara jumped on Luna's shoulder and allowed the girl to carry her up.

Professor Trelawney screamed when she saw Luna.

"A... A two tailed cat!" she gasped. "A very, _very_ bad omen! Put it down, girl!"

"It... It's just a cat," Luna squeaked. Kirara jumped off her shoulder and scampered behind a mirror.

"Yes... Well... That's a big enough scare for today," Trelawney replied, with a hand to her heart nervously. "Now... Let's see..." They both sat at the large crystal ball on the table.

Miroku stared at the broom on the ground. It looked old and dryed out. He wondered if it would give him splinters.

"U...Up?" To his surprise, it rolled on the ground on it's own. Maybe this _would_ work after all. "UP!" he commanded. The broom zoomed to his fingers. He sat on it. It felt right, somehow. He dropped his staff in order to grip the broom. He just had a feeling... He pulled up on the handle and the broom lifted him off his feet gently. He knew what to do. He leaned forwards and lifted straight off the pitch. Making a wide circle around the feild, he searched for his friends. They must be indoors. He ignored the cries of the teacher, screaming in protest, and instead floated straight up to the windows of Hogwarts, peeking into every one. It was his own good luck that he missed the washrooms.

Kagome looked up from her fit of laughing in time to see Miroku stop just outside the classroom. She was still pretty happy about things.

"Sango, look! It's Miroku! What fun!" Both the girls gathered at the window, giggling. _Oh, my,_ Miroku thought gleefully. He stretched a hand in through the window.

"Hello, Sango," he said, reaching for his secret spot. Kagome kept laughing, but the effects of the happy spell suddenly wore off for Sango.

"Mirokuuuuuu," she snarled, and caught him squarely in the face with a well aimed slap.

Inuyasha stared happily at his potion. He had somehow done everything right. That, for one thing, was a first. The other first was that he now had a bright pink love potion. Snape looked into his cauldron angrily. No, this couldn't be right. Nobody could make this potion. Not on their first try. He decided it was a cheap copy. They had done something wrong, it was a fake. And fake potions _never_ worked. He dipped a flask into the cauldron and sniffed it.

"Class, I am now going to test this cheap phony potion we've got here, to show you what happens when you anger your teacher with cheap copies. If this is indeed a real love potion, I will fall in love with the first person I see, but if it's what I think it is, nothing will happen at all."

"Gee," Shippou said thoughtfully, "is that really such a good idea? I mean, there's a whole classroom of students here, and you're bound to look at one of them-"

Snape cut him off with a look of death. Shippou stopped talking quickly.

"That's alright. I will keep my eyes fixedly on you two. Unless you don't want me to drink, of course?"

"No," Inuyasha answered. "Not really." It was at this moment, as Snape was staring at Inuyasha, that he drank the love potion. For a moment, he seemed normal...

"Inuyasha..." he said softly.

"Keh. What _now?_" There was silence.

"Where have you _been_ all my life?" Snape asked, throwing his arms forwards and chasing Inuyasha around the room. It was truly amazing how he managed to keep up with a fleeing half-demon.

"Aaaack! Shippou, _help me!_"

"You got what was coming," Shippou answered, sitting down and laughing with the rest of the class.

Kirara watched Luna and Trelawney stare into the crystal.

"Do you see what I see?" Luna asked in horror. "It's... It's Nao, isn't it? What is she doing?" Professor Trelawney gasped.

"No," Trelawney said in horror. "She's... She's colouring her hair with muggle dye! It's not magic!"

"Oh, dear, oh dear," Malfoy said, stepping out from the shadows. Both females in the room screamed in surprise. "It seems Nao isn't the true witch we thought she was. Perhaps... Dare I say it... She's a filthy mud-"

It is around now, perhaps, that I should explain that animals- two-tailed cat demons included- can recognize tone and meaning in spoken words. It was very obvious that Malfoy was going to say something very nasty indeed. Kirara jumped out at him with teeth bared and transformed right there. It took a moment for Malfoy to understand that he was facing 50 pounds of teeth, muscle, two tails, claws, and fire. But of course, once he recognized that he was facing 50 pounds of teeth, muscle, two tails, claws, and fire, he shot out from under Kirara and dissappeared out the trap door. The 'kitty' then changed again into the regular little kitten form and hopped on Luna's shoulder. Trelawny gaped but didn't say anything for a long time.

------

Well, that was fun! Unfortunately Nao wasn't in this one because she was busy colouring her hair with muggle dye! She'll be there next chapter, don't worry... In all her random glory. And, for your sneak peek as always, so will Neville! Yes- Neville will return for another chapter! And for that matter, So will the new Inuyasha and Snape duo! What really _will_ happen with those two? And Kagome gets a taste of some Inu+Shippou lovey potion- but who turns out to be the lucky guy? Meanwhile it's Miroku's turn at sleeping draught potions, and Sango's turn at A History of Magic... Who will stay awake longer? And, finally, the death and destruction when Malfoy jumps Nao in the halls with his wand out! Although the outcome may shock you... Stay tuned, folks, we're gonna have another Harry surprise, too. No pun intended. And it involves blast-ended skrewts. _Lots_ of blast-ended skrewts.


	6. A Skrewt By Many Other Names

I'm SOOO sorry! I've been so busy! AND I've had writer's block! But that's all about to change as I unleash... Chapter 6! Chapter 6! Look how far we've come! Hurrah! Alright, folks, lessee here... The entire cast of Inuyasha characters have come to Hogwarts because of an unfortunate time travel well accident thingy! The result is that Kagome's just recovered from Happy spell influence, Malfoy got chased out of professor Trelawney's room by Kirara, Sango has discovered Miroku's flying talents (no really, he's great at broomstick flying) and Inuyasha and Shippou have discovered their own potions talents... A bit too well, might I add, because Snape has fallen for Inuyasha due to a very well made love potion- which Inuyasha is currently taking to use on Kagome at this very moment, but Snape still loves him... Where did we go wrong here? Poor Inuyasha. So now it's fourth period!

Disclaimer: I don't own these characters, but I sure as heck like using them in my twisted fan fics. I also don't own perfume or Febreeze.

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Neville blinked. The hall was strangely empty. Unknown to him, the rumor of Dead-Alive Neville had spread quickly and people had raced to their dorms. And still, there was that awful funky smell. Dang, if only he could spray perfume or Febreeze or something everywhere...

Sango sat in the Hufflepuff dorm, new black robes and all. Shippou was trying to sit on her head, except there was a problem with the pointy hat. There was a mild floppy noise as her hat fell off, and Shippou finally got his spot on her ponytail. Sango let him wear her hat instead.

"Why do you think Neville's... Alive again?" Shippou asked, the hat sopping over his eyes- and the rest of him, for that matter.

"That hat's too big for you, take it off. And I don't really know why," Sango answered. Her mind was preoccupied with the fact that every single pair of eyes was on the midget and girl-with-the-enormous-scary-dangerous-pointy-object-type-boomerang-thingy-weapon-made-of-creepy-bone. She shifted around nervously. Miroku sat in a chair nearby, and noticed Sango's obvious discomfort with the stares. He was quite glad that all three of them had ended up in the same house. It probably meant he shared some sort of connection with Sango's mind.

"Come on," he said quickly, as Sango started to dance on her toes in a swort of Scottish jig. "We should still head for our next classes... I have Potions, what about you?"

"H-history of Magic," Sango answered. Shippou grinned. A History class with Sango. What fun!

Kagome was heading back from the Gryffindor common room for an odd sounding class with Inuyasha. Yes, another class with him! What was it called again?

"Care of Magical Creatures," she read off her timetable. "That sounds like fun. What do you think? Inuyasha? What are you... Oh, for the love of-"

Inuyasha was down on the floor sniffing. He hadn't bothered to put on his new robes, but he had at least put on the hat. He looked up. Kagome, of course, looked absolutely smack-dab fabulous in those sweeping black clothes... The hat fell so perfectly over her hair, and that wand wasn't bad either...

"What are you looking at?" Kagome asked suspiciously.

"What? Nothing. And for your information, I smell that greasy guy from Potions."

"So? What about him?"

"Erm..." Inuyasha stood up and tried to explain, but at that very moment Snape raced around the corner.

"InuYashaaaaaaa!" he called happily. "Come back! I... I _love_ you! Come back!"

"Henh?" Kagome squeaked, but Inuyasha had already grabbed her wrist and taken off at top half-demon speed down the halls.

"Don't you love me?" Snape asked the empty hall, completely devastated. "Ah, how love hurts..."

Meanwhile, another teacher stood at the front of another class.

"And... Sir Groveleigh... Ogre... Stabbed... 1984... Dragons... Blah... Blah... Sheep... Blah..."

Sango caught only half the monotone words. Was this some sort of enchantment? Sleep, sleep was a good thing... There were drowsy waves rippling across the classroom. Shippou was already snoring. Her eyes closed and she dropped her head on her desk, letting her quill loose on the page so that it drew a nice clean line diagonally across her parchment. She flicked it around lazily, keeping her eyes closed...

Miroku sat in class, just as confused as everyone else. Professor Snape didn't seem to exist, it seemed. Finally, in a slithering sort of motion, Snape appeared at the front of the class, his eyes very red.

"Today, class... We will be learning sleeping draughts. It is a _very_ difficult potion, but also very useful..." His eyes flashed. At what, nobody knew. For the rest of the class, Miroku toiled over the cauldron, trying to make a thin grey, smokey sort of potion. He ended up with a thick black gunk that sort of resembled demon blood. Perhaps he could make it look like he was dying and could escape this horrible class before he inhaled too much sleeping draught. He spooned a thick pile of gunk onto his hand and splattered it all over his arm, then dipped his chopping knife into the liquid as well.

"Auuugh!" he shouted. He had meant for the scream to be fake, except for the fact that some sort of asparagus was now blossoming from his robes. There were giggles. Professor Snape whirled angrily.

"What... Are... You... Doing?" he seethed.

"N-nothing, Professor," Miroku answered innocently, holding off the green weeds which were now sprouting across his hair. They started to blossom little purple flowers.

Kagome stared in putrid shock at the disgusting demon before her. It sort of resembled a scorpion, crossed with a spider, crossed with a firecracker, crossed with a chrome Ford car. The blast-ended skrewt looked at her innocently, except for the fact that it was the size of a horse.

"This 'ere is a blast-ended skrewt. This particular skrewt's called Hammy, an' don' forget, he likes his name tha way it is," Hagrid boomed. Kagome shrank behind Inuyasha, twitching with repulsion.

"Here," Inuyasha said, handing her a bottle of bright pink swirling liquid.

"Oh, gross. That's almost more disgusting than the skrewt. What is it?"

"It's... Um... Skrewt repellant," Inuyasha lied. "I found it in the potions storage box." Smooth. So smooth.

"Wow! Thank you, Inuyasha," Kagome answered happily. "What do I do with it?"

"Um... Drink it. They don't like the smell." It wasn't _exactly_ a lie. He didn't like the smell, so the skrewt probably didn't, either. Kagome looked at the skrewt.

"Okay, Hammy," she challenged. "How do ya like this?" And she drank the potion on the spot.

"Kagome?" Inuyasha asked nervously. He _had_ to be the first person she saw or...

"Hammyyyyyyyyy!" Kagome screamed, throwing herself at the skrewt. "You are _sooo _adorable! Come here, let me give you a scratch behind the ears!"

"Woah, calm down," Harry said, appearing from the crowd. "It's a _skrewt._"

"I know," Kagome blushed. "Isn't it absolutely gorgeous? I mean, look at that tail!"

"Oh boy." Inuyasha sighed. He had tried so hard... Why did his plans always turn out so... Wrong? "What do we do?" he asked Harry.

"What do you mean?"

"It... It's love potion."

"Oh boy. Um... Well, I guess if it _died..."_

"Right," Inuyasha said, grabbing the handle of his sword.

"No! Sit, boy!" Kagome commanded, noticing that Inuyasha was about to kill her precious foo-foo Hammy. Harry sighed, and stepped over the body which was currently going into some sort of convulsive muscle spasms.

"Ka...Kagome," Inuyasha whined, twitching.

Nao walked down the halls towards the library. It was her free period and she wanted to get something done. A noise behind her made her turn around.

"No screaming," Malfoy said smugly, pushing his wand against her forehead.

"Um... What are you doing?" Nao asked, not particularly bothered by the fact that there was a dangerous object against her head. "You've got nothing to do with me, Malfoy, so I suggest you leave." Her purple hair waved with her words, reminding Malfoy of what he had seen earlier.

"As a matter of fact... I saw you colouring your hair with..." He held up a little box. "_Muggle dye... _You're just a nasty little mudblood, aren't you?"

"Shut up, you yabberdoodle. And where did you get my hair colour?"

"Um... Nevermind. But I think you know already... I don't _like_ mudbloods." For a moment, it really did look like it could be the end for our new friend Nao. But then, suddenly, there was a loud bang. Malfoy was whipped sideways down the hall, and crashed into the wall at the other end. Nao stood perfectly fine, protected by a strong knight statue.

The dust settled. Malfoy lay unconcious at one end of the hall... Kagome lay in tears at the other end.

"Hammy! How could you? Oh, Hammy! You didn't deserve to explode! Oh, I'm sorry! I should have protected you!"

"Stop blubbering," Inuyasha sighed, watching Harry lower his wand.

"Um... What's a Hammy?" Nao asked, unsure of whether she really wanted to know what just blew up.

"Hammy was a blast-ended skrewt," Harry answered, trying not to laugh.

"A very, very brave skrewt," Kagome sobbed, clutching the end of a very long dog leash with ash and dust all over it. "Oh, _Hammy!_"

"Oh, no," Nao said quietly.

"What?" Kagome asked suddenly, as she stopped crying. "Wait... What happened? Weren't we at Hagrid's class? What happened to the skrewt? And... Why am I holding a burned dog-leash?" The effects of the potion wore off quickly, it seemed. Inuyasha sighed deeply from relief... And also partially because of that disgusting smell he was trying to remember. Man, it smelled bad.

"Blast-ended skrewts," Nao said nervously. "If one explodes... It lets out a scent that calls other skrewts. We're going to be overrun..."

"By scorpion-Ford-firecrackers?" Kagome asked in horror.

"Yes. By... Erm... Scorpion... Ford... Er... Skrewts," Nao answered.

"And by greasy-haired nuts," Inuyasha said, walking backwards.

"Wait! I still love you!" Snape shouted from the end of the hall, completely missing Malfoy and the blasted skrewt, and dashing towards the group of stunned teenagers.

"So," Nao said cheerfully. "When's the marriage?"

"Oh, shut up," Inuyasha screamed over his shoulder, bounding away.

"Are we missing something here?" Sango asked, appearing around the corner with Shippou.

"I didn't know those chocolates were for Inuyasha," Miroku mused, also appearing, covered from head to toe in bright purple and flourescent pink flowers and some form of corn. Inuyasha pelted straight through them and dissappeared in a flurry. His hat floated, sadly abandoned, to the ground in front of Kagome.

------

Yeah. I'm still nursing my writer's block. Please don't hurt me... Daaaah... Anyways, in our next chapter: It's dinner, and it's time for some cool rumors to be unleashed to stir things up a bit, I believe! Plus, numerous skrewt exterminations! Also, a new wizard has arrived at school- his name is Naraku, and he's got cool glowing red eyes! He's also really, really evil! So what happens when he encounters Harry? And what happens when Kirara meets Peanut, Nao's oh-so-cuddly little kitty? New problems, dillemas, and skrewt encounters in our next chapter, folks, so stay tuned for more random goodness!


	7. Taste Test This, It Might Be Evil

Dear Loyal Readers, forgive me for taking soooo long for chapter 7, but SCHOOL started again and it's been hounding me for more homework every day. Well, screw homework on saturday, I'm going to go blow up a few skrewts! So where were we? Due to a freak accident the entire cast of Inuyasha went through the well and ended up at Hogwarts. Due to even more freak accidents, Snape is now in love with Inuyasha, Kagome is still in love with Inuyasha and- last but not least- Hammy the Skrewt just went up in a blaze of glory... Or something like glory, anyways. And now it's lightly perfuming the school with the scent of dead skrewt, just waiting for its friends and family to follow the smell to avenger his- her? death. Welcome to the great hall, we hope your meal is satisfactory!

Disclaimer: Oh, for the love of... Look, am I J.K. Rowling? Or Rumiko Takahashi? Do I look like I'm writing manga or a fanfic? Which do YOU think? I DO NOT OWN THESE CHARACTERS! Sigh Darn you lawyer peoples! I'm sick of writing that!

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"InuYashaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!"

"Quit following me!"

"B-but you're my one true love!"

"I don't care!"

"Wheee! I finally caught you, you cute, purrdy, absolutely fantabulous li'l-"

"Aaagh! Gerroff me!"

The sounds of Snape and Inuyasha scuffling down the hallway was quite an interesting dillema for most of the Hogwarts students. Harry peered at them from down the corridor witha look of pity and amusement. On the one hand, Inuyasha was getting flattened by a madman, and he was truly sorry. On the other hand...

"Just- choose- the- stupid- bridesmaid- dress- from- the- cataolgue-"

Snape was making a fool of himself. The pros outweighed the cons here.

"Eat the chocolate hearts, Inuyasha, please!"

Yes, for the moment, Harry decided to make no effort to help the screaming half-demon. Kagome, meanwhile, was tearing her hair out. Literally.

"Um, Kagome," Sango said nervously, as another clump of black tufted to the floor. "I know this looks a bit disturbing, but I don't think there's any reason to..."

"Me? _Worry?_" Kagome shrieked.

"...To pull your hair out."

"What? O-oh. I see." Kagome's eyes looked down at the floor. "Eeeeeeeee! My hair!"

"Shut up and help me!" Inuyasha demanded, giving Snape a violent kick in the-

"_Inuyasha, you dirty... Sit!_" Kagome's voice cut the air. Inuyasha crashed over Snape. The two of them sprawled there dazedly. "Come on." Kagome grabbed his wrist and dragged him back to Gryffindor common. Her friends stood in mild shock.

"So... What about skrewts?" Miroku asked Nao finally.

The group met up again as they walked towards the Great Hall that evening.

"Did you hear?" Hermione whispered, because she had followed Harry and Harry had followed Inuyasha. "We have a new DADA teacher, because the last one was a total..."

"-Snot," Ron finished for her.

"Yes, well, I quite liked him," Hermione replied haughtily, before everyone split up again to sit with their friends at the house tables.

"Hummm," Kagome said, helping herself to a plate of something squishy and grey that tasted delightful despite its looks. "A new DADA teacher, eh? I wonder who he is?"

She didn't have long to wait. At that moment, Dumbledore stood up. A hush fell on the crowd.

"Due to some rather unfortunate circumstances, our origional Professor Lockhart has left the school." Whispers shot through the hall happily. "So in his place, allow me to introduce..."

Silence.

"Just a moment, he doesn't appear to be here at the moment."

The crowd of students began to look around quizzically. Suddenly, the starry ceiling turned to acid purple clouds. A gaseous mist fell upon the students and people began to cough. In a swirl of cloudy violet, somebody touched down in the center of the hall, and the miasma sucked back into the ceiling, which instantly cleared into stars again.

"Ah, there he is," Dumbledore said with a clap of his hands, as if intoxicating the students was nothing to worry about. Everybody stared at the new teacher. He wore an odd white monkey pelt, so that you couldn't see his body or head at all. A blue baboon muzzle jutted out to cover his face, masking everything except his eyes and mouth. Although his face seemed a dark black as no light could get to it, the students could just make out a crimson glow from his eyes, but most dismissed it as a trick of the light. "Students of Hogwarts," the headmaster called merrily. "Please greet... Your new Professor Naraku!"

Inuyasha suddenly choked on his food, and he could see he wasn't alone- Kagome was making an unhealthy hacking noise next to him. He smacked her spine. A waterfall of lumpy grey stuff erupted across the table.

"Gross," he commented.

"Why were you eating the Treacle Skrewt?" Harry asked, feeling a bit tricksey today. Kagome instantly started making more rasping noises. "I was only kidding!" he said in shock. Kagome gave him an icy glare.

The New Professor Naraku stared around the room silently. Even the first years could see that he was slowly scanning the entire student body. Inuyasha looked at Kagome. Kagome looked at Inuyasha. And right at that moment, Naraku looked at both of them.

"Oooooh dear," Kagome whispered. She had the strangest feeling she was going to fail her next DADA class. Harry, meanwhile, got up and raced over to Naraku, his hand extended.

"Excuse me, Professor, sir, but let me be the first to introduce you to our school! Welcome to Hogwarts!" He didn't seem to notice the look of death that Naraku was giving him. "My new friends Inuyasha and Kagome would like to introduce you, too, I'm sure! And by the way, my name is Harry Potter!" Yes, it certainly was strange how he could say everything he shouldn't have said all in one sentence.

"Erm... Hello," Naraku said. He sounded a bit like he was strangling himself. Inuyasha and Kagome made hurried slit-throat motions to Harry in the background. Harry ignored them and smiled at Naraku in a friendly way. "And... Will you be in my Defence Against The Dark Arts class?" Naraku asked, twitching violently.

"You can just call it DADA," Harry answered. "And of _course_ I will!" Naraku relaxed visibly for no particular reason.

"_Wonderful,"_ Naraku replied hungrily. Kagome and Inuyasha sank under the table.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch- or, in this case, Hagrid's paddock- Peanut the cat was practicing a cool balancing act along the fence. Suddenly, though, Peanut stopped. The delicate pads of her kitty paws had sensed something unusual. The tawny cat blinked at the forest innocently. For a moment, everything seemed fine. Except for at that moment, an entire colony of skrewts burst out of the trees and flooded towards the school... And the innocent cat balancing on the fence.

Peanut hopped to the ground and scampered off, but something like a scorpion crossed with a spider crossed with a firecracker crossed with a chrome Ford car slithered in front of her like a centrillapede. The cat stopped and backed away warily. The blast-ended skrewt advanced, clicking a pair of pincers, its scorpion tail waving frantically. It darted at the cat with its claws and could have mashed the poor kitty into the ground, but something black, white and red all over suddenly pounced on it, sending it flying backwards in a shower of sparks before it blew into millions of pieces.

Kirara landed safely next to Peanut, who scrambled onto the firecat's back before the two of them sailed towards the school to warn everyone of the oncoming Rally of Skrewts.

Inside, Neville was heading for the great hall. After all, he _was_ supposed to eat, wasn't he? But something was bothering him... Like somebody here wanted to control him... His mind melted away. A voice in his head slipped in quietly.

"You carry a jewel shard... Neville Longbottom."

"Yes, my Lord."

Naraku's powers of jewel shard control had gotten to him easily. Neville turned around and headed back to Gryffindor to wait for Harry. Naraku smiled to himself. _My puppet,_ he crooned in his mind happily. _You shall not go to waste..._

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I am soooo sorry this took so long, but school came back and I got braces and I'm back in a music program and and and...! But anyways, just so you know, I'm still alive and writing! Dunna worry... Slightly will continue to write until she DIES! Ow, my teeth. Anyways, next time... Splendifforous Nao gets a taste of Naraku's evil, while Kagome and Inuyasha finally notice something's afoot with the gosh darned skrewts. Kirara makes a new friend, but while she's socializing, Harry's gone to bed... Or rather, walked upstairs and met the New And Improved Criminally Insane Neville Longbottom, now to be known as NAICINL! Okay, not really. Sango and Miroku finally get back to eachother, but Shippou's found some rather nasty stuff... In the girls washroom, no less. Plus- startling guest appearance by Mad Eye Moody's... Um... Eye! See ya next time!


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